Really not having fun at work these days. I called home for encouragement and was presented with three options:

1. keep the current job
2. prostitute yourself to a rich man "if you're compatible"
and a grudging 3. teach at a catholic high school

oh and 4. move, as a 26 year old, into an old folks home to take care of your grandmother

Boo. No fun. This kind of conversation reminds me that my mother and I do have our differences of opinion in these matters. Maybe I won't be a carbon copy of her in 30 years after all.

I would have told me whoa whoa whoa, I know we're having a bad day, but we just financed a cat surgery, my friend. Let's take a step back here. Let's remember our plan. Let us not quit our job in haste. We are having a bad work day, yes. Agreed. No argument there. But let's wait till the dust settles on all this reshuffling before we do anything rash. At the very least till any vacation debt won't be deducted from our final paycheck. If trying to help merchants with hard questions makes your numbers look bad, so be it. If it means you won't get promoted, so be it. Let's keep our eyes on the prize here. And the prize, frankly, doesn't have anything to do with work. If work is making you frustrated, put in your 8 hours and leave work at work. Take your paycheck and save your energy for something you actually care about.

Same conclusion really, but it's all about the execution.

I need to start writing more posts from home when I'm in my happy moods...

Postcards from abroad, episode 2: from a hutong in Beijing

When you first land in Beijing, the new terminals of the airport are stunning. At the right time of day, the high curved ceilings make you feel like you're in a golden bamboo forest. For such a huge place, the airport felt empty and quiet.

Having stayed awake most of the twelve hour flight over, it was a struggle to keep my eyes open for the taxi ride into town. All I remember of that first trip down the airport expressway is the lights of a city at night. I remember that particular shade of orange with the slightest hint of foreignness. Which seemed odd, considering how far I'd come.

But when we were deposited at the start of a dirt road next to a sign that claimed our hostel was to be found somewhere within the sandy maze, it was real. The first couple of steps through the dark narrow streets felt like I'd walked through a time warp. There were bright lights strung up for the construction that would go on from about 6 or 7 am until 10 at night every day we were in Beijing. I couldn't imagine that those particular pipes which were being installed so urgently were for the Olympics, but then again, everything is for the Olympics. Near the construction site there was a fruit stall set up, a fruit stall that only appeared at night. I'd read about the way crowds form in China, and the six or seven people standing around the hole in the ground, watching, were the first of many crowds I'd watch materialize.

The first couple of days, we'd head out of the hutong to see the Sights. And we ate at Kylie's restaurant because it boasted the ability to serve us in English. Even in something as familiar as a big city, that particular sign was surprisingly inviting.

But towards the end of our stay, I thought we should try walking up our street the other direction. The way that doesn't lead straight out to the main road. And that day was when it felt like I discovered China. Not because the houses are small and packed in close. Or because it can be hard to walk a bike through these back streets with all the construction and enormous piles of soft sand which will be used to mix cement by hand. But there is a life in the hutong that is either hidden or just too diluted on the main roads. You can find the same attention grabbing shouts and tugs on your arm in Silk Street, but there is something more honest and intimate in the hutong. This is where China lives. Judging by the walls being thrown up to hide the view, it's not the face China means to show, but I thought it was beautiful.

Do you know what is sometimes the greatest thing ever? Photobooth. Real photobooths are great too, but look, look..



Ahahaha
Sometimes it's nice to know I can be this easily amused.

Today is one of those terrible terrible days that just won't end. Case in point: it's only 11:42 am.

The word shit-storm comes to mind when thinking about how things are going lately.

I'm either getting sick or really, really out of shape. Biking to/from work (and conferencing with India at night) has me all tuckered out by 7pm. Not to mention that my ride home on Tuesday set the record for the highest number of people trying to kill me in a twenty minute window.

I did manage to pick up my batch of Holga and xprocess 35mm China/Mongolia develop+scans the other day though and I am pleased with them. Not sure I'll do much more cross processing for a while, but I'm really into the pics I got out of the Holga. I want to do a little sprucing in Photoshop and then I'll start posting more postcard stories. Look forward to that.

Supposedly the dark room opened back up for summer this week, so I should have a productive if lonely weekend ahead of me. A weekend with no band practice is a sad prospect indeed, but with lots of darkroom-ing and a valiant attempt to make great strides on this baby quilt, I should be able to power through it.

Trying not to think about what I'll do once all my friends move away in the next couple of months.

I'm thinking of maybe trying to go camping for the birthday this year. Still thinking positive thoughts about that.

And of course about Iceland, greenery, and the environment. At least there's that.

Were you aware of it? vol. 6: The gold in goldfish

During the Tang Dynasty, it was popular to dam carp in ponds. As the result of a dominant genetic mutation, some of these carp displayed gold (actually yellowish orange) rather than silver coloration. People began to breed the gold variety instead of the silver variety, and began to display them in small containers. The fish were not kept in the containers permanently, but would be kept in a larger body of water, such as a pond, and only for special occasions at which guests were expected would they be moved to the much smaller container.

In 1162, the Empress of the Song Dynasty ordered the construction of a pond to collect the red and gold variety of those carp. By this time, people outside the imperial family were forbidden to keep goldfish of the gold (yellow) variety, yellow being the imperial color. This is probably the reason why there are more orange goldfish than yellow goldfish, even though the latter are genetically easier to breed.

Selective breeding over centuries has produced several color variations, some of them far removed from the "golden" color of the originally domesticated fish. Goldfish may also lose their "golden" color, or rather any goldfish color, by being kept in a dark room, which causes the scales to turn white.

**Courtesy of Wikipedia

Postcards from abroad, episode 1: From a ger in Bodh Khan National Park

Just outside Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

Hearing the wind and horses neighing, and shovelling for the new row of gers as the workers mix concrete. The kids must be gone because I can't hear them laughing & yelling as they play - at least not over the wind. 1pm: time for lunch. The sun has moved from the wall over Vijay's bed to the west corner of the table, where the tea sits.

If you were to volunteer for a Peace Corps assignment in Mongolia, you would start in the summer. The steppes would be grassy and green. In the hope that that memory would sustain you as the temperatures slip and the colors fade. As you add the winter door to your ger. Spring becomes a miracle and you hang on each protracted step, as the light May snows wash a hint of color across the plains.

sick kitty :(

I woke up to a call asking for a few thousand dollars to save my cat. His kidneys are failing and they need to know now... What do you say to that? Your options are a couple months of salary or put him down. I guess my dad said no.

I've heard about a rule of three. about filling your karmic duties and being let go. about once you've done your three, you're set. I think I've counted to three a couple of times.

Sometimes you feel like God. I hesitated. I said yes. Go. Do it. Maybe I feel like I've been to enough hospitals and funerals this year.

Numbers are just numbers, right? At least this time I can say I tried. Maybe I'll just work a little longer next year?

I hope it helps.

Were you aware of it? vol. 5: Modern tips for people who snore

Exercise daily to maintain a healthful body weight and improve muscle tone. Avoid exercise within 2 hours of bedtime, because exercise may make it harder to fall asleep.

Avoid heavy meals, alcohol, sleeping pills, and antihistamines before bedtime.

Sleep on your side rather than on your back. (Sew a pocket onto the back of your pajama top, and put a tennis ball inside the pocket. This will keep you from sleeping on your back.)

Establish regular sleeping patterns. Go to bed at the same time every night, even on weekends.

Let the person who doesn't snore fall asleep first.

**Courtesy of the Kaiser Permanente Healthwise Handbook, 2004

I am back!

I can honestly say that when I stepped off the plane at LAX last Friday, I have never been happier to be home.

China and Mongolia were awesome and I could talk your ear off about all the experiences I had. I think the biggest thing to come out of this trip though. Aside from a little better appreciation of what's up with China. Is a little more - dare I say - direction.

After reading Michael Pollan all through Mongolia, I'm of course energized about food and food politics and agriculture and sustainability &c, but seeing Sunaree in her Peace Corps digs and chatting with her volunteer buddies from the PC and the diff programs Australia has, I'm feeling really drawn to the Peace Corps. I even went to an info session Tuesday night and man did that guy do a good marketing job. Reading through all the brochures I picked up, it just sounds more and more like doing a PC stint would make me use all my favorite things that I've done.

Working indoors attached to a computer for years dulls your memory to the awareness that there was a time when you once did things that meant something to you. That you still do some of these things. But looking through the job requirements for Peace Corps, I've been realizing that wait I Have done a lot of this stuff. I Would actually make a good volunteer. Despite typing emails for a living for years, I actually have other non-computer skills I can use to like make a difference.

I do have two years of French, I already was planning to get 6 months of agricultural experience, I've been composting for over a year, I'm trained up in CPR and First Aid and I've been dying to spend a month in Mexico learning Spanish for ages. I have been a camp counselor. I have worked with deaf kids. I haven't ever tutored for money but I help the sibs out for free on a lot of stuff and I'm not perfect, but I think I do a decent job. And I'm like a decent, capable human being.

I've managed to work a corporate job for three years without becoming evil. Two years? Two years.

Anyway, I'm telling you that I'm hoping to maybe aim for Peace Corps in 2010. Just to make me accountable.

Who knows what I'll do afterwards, but if I can feel this confident after bumming around Asia for three weeks, I could practically be a seer on the mount after farming + Peace Corps. All of this will be hard, but I think it will be hard in the best way.

ps. In case you hadn't noticed, all the travel pics I posted so far were stolen from the internet. Still working on dealing with the three cameras worth of photos I have in various formats. Processing of those will begin tomorrow. Fear not, I will plaster any good ones about as soon as I can. Maybe I'll post more trip specifics as pics become available? How does that sound?

Ulaanbaatar

Just stopping in to say hello from Mongolia. We're stopped at an internet cafe in hopes of finally confirming payment for our plane tickets from Beijing to Dayong to visit Aron. It has been an uphill battle.

Mongolia is great, though. I love it so far. Ulaanbaatar looks a lot more Soviet/Socialist than Asian, but there are still Buddhist temples and monks and older people and children wearing the traditional robes and boots and hats (all of which I want badly). The people here are remarkably stylish. I saw some kid with a Diesel bag and another guy with a LaCoste sweater - and they don't all look like the knockoffs you find in China. Everyone has been super nice too. It's great seeing Sunaree after all this time. And actually, we've been able to meet up with someone in every place we've been so far, which is rad.

Today we're doing the museum thing since it snowed this morning. Then Sunday we head out to the countryside to stay in a ger camp (see photo) and, with any luck, ride some Mongolian horses.

Still very much in love with the idea of farming a year from now. Michael Pollan is egging me on.

Will have more stories when I return!!